So, I ask myself…
“what would I do without coffee to begin my mornings?”
“sleep until noon?”
as usual, Self is right. I’d not move very fast at all, on any mornings, without the morning ritual ~ which just happens to include having coffee.
Self seems to be my only company these days, I spend a lot of my time with a 19 month old child who doesn’t talk, and anytime he is with the ‘rents, I am hiding from their angst in my room with my critters.
Now, Self does not really like doing this, but Self is trying to stay sane while she figures out where/why/when/how to go anywhere else at all, or if putting up with the shit that goes on here is worth what might come out of hanging on for just a little while longer.
I’ll let you know what Self decides, for it is not easy to hang on where one is not really appreciated for what one manages to do ~ And occasionally, angerfied at for not finishing what is not hers to do to begin with.
Self tends to be thought less of on the days when Self is to tired to even function, let alone clean up after a hoard of people, dogs and kitties on a dusty road, in the middle of a windy field, on a day where it is 104F in the shade…
It is very hard on Self to deal with this ~ for Self has learned to ignore the problems of her body is to be ready to die early.
would that Selfs’ children would accept this.
Maybe the children are right, maybe it is just a matter of mind over matter.
I’ve given Self a headache.
time for another pot of coffee.
I’m drowning my Self in the bottom of a coffee cup.
I have to ~ drinking before noon is kinda bad.
Go out and be excellent today ~ the world needs it.